her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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