i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize