I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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