My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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