y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
