Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
