I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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