We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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