i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
