I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
The adults are the big ones right?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
