I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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