this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize