I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
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