really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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