My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
