i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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