have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
