margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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