I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize