Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
