Screwed.edu
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
