Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
