I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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