His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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