Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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