Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
