The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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