I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
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