I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
