one might say we're banned from that church
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
