the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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