Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
