Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
