HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
