So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
