i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
