Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
