This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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