i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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