The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize