Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
