yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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