pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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