dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Im part way to drunk.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
