I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
