after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
