Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
