i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Randomize