I think I am morally bankrupt
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
