More tranny stories later!
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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