you would pick up someone in the library
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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